Internet Stalkers

[cara7166]

Do you have any suggestions about dealing with adult internet stalkers? After having things clarified by the police a few times, she knows right where the line is where she can get arrested.

On one hand I'm glad that it's not in-person stalking anymore (still the occasional text message or phone call), but it gets old. This has been going on for 4 1/2 years now.

So, what have we done? Changed web site address, changed names we use on the internet several times now, changed online games we play, changed phone numbers repeated times, moved several times, and of course we do call the police at ANY opportunity that arises---but this has continued to follow us from forum to forum to forum. I think it only took her a week to find our new website. Ignoring only seems to escalate ---which is good in a way because it lends itself to another opportunity to call the police.

Any ideas additional to what we have already done?

[KIDPOWER]

It sounds like you are doing a good job and I am really sorry that you have to deal with this. It's creepy to have someone follow you around. According to violence prediction expert Gavin DeBecker, not responding, collecting documentation, and notifying the police when you can are your best bets.

Do you know who this person is and why this person is stalking you?

You might try creating dummy phone numbers/web sites for her to focus on - and having your other information and activities off-line for a while except at a place like UofMom, where you can use a different name completely and trust that your information won't get shared with anyone.

[Geminimomma]

Ewww That is freaky. I am so sorry you are going through all of this.

[cara7166]

Hi Irene,

Yes we do know who she is - suffice it to say she has an unhealthy obsession with a family member. I'm sure that over time even documenting 'on the line' type activities will build up and will be actionable.

I am glad that you think we are doing the right things. It's funny you mention Gavin deBecker, I love him...his book "Gift of Fear" is an excellent resource.

Thank you for being here. I am really enjoying reading this forum. Lots of great answers!!

Cara

[Busty Vixen]

Love Gift of Fear! Protecting the Gift is another great one for parents. :ita:

[cara7166]

Oooh I did not know about that one Busty, I will definitely check that out. Thank you.

[KIDPOWER]

Another resource that addresses cyber-safety is a book called Look Both Ways. The author used to run be in charge of safety for Microsoft. http://look-both-ways.com

By the way, Gavin deBecker, who is the author of both books, which are brilliant, is a long time member of our Law Enforcement Advisory Committee. Here's his wonderful endorsement about KIDPOWER:

According to Gavin De Becker, Violence Expert And Best Selling Author Of Protecting The Gift And The Gift Of Fear, “KIDPOWER has an exceptional track record in the field of personal safety and violence prevention. For 30 years, I’ve advised major media figures, government agencies, Fortune 500 companies, and universities on the prediction and prevention of violence. I’ve learned that no aspect of a security program is more important than accurately assessing potential safety hazards before they evolve. KIDPOWER gives people the opportunity to take charge of their own safety by assisting in the development of skills to assess, avoid, de-escalate, and escape from violent or abusive situations. Personal safety training that fosters worry or anxiety is counterproductive. KIDPOWER helps to reduce worry by promoting confidence and personal power.”

[cara7166]

That is awesome, Irene!! Great endorsement, I really liked his Gift of Fear book.

I am definitely going to go to Barnes & Noble today and find "Protecting the Gift."