Survivors.

[Dream]

I have been through a couple traumatic things in my life. One was and is very personal, the other was almost being killed in a car accident.
I have been through counseling and worked through a lot of the emotional pain that comes with such things.
I also know that in a second you can be right back to feeling like it happened just yesterday.

I consider myself a survivor. I have been told that somethings just stay with you for the rest of your life.
I am asking , in your opinion is this necessarily true?

[KIDPOWER]

Dear Dream,

First of all, I appreciate your courage in asking and your courage in being a survivor.

It is true someone who has survived traumatic experiences is likely to develop triggers where seemingly small things might suddenly bring up extremely upset feelings and terrible memories. However, you can learn to take the power out of your triggers so that you can stop them from going off most of the time and develop tools for managing the tidal wave of feelings that come up when they start to go off, so that triggers from the past do not stop you from having the joy and freedom that you deserve in your life.

Therapy is part of the answer - and you might need to go back into therapy at different times in your life to continue to integrate past trauma with who you become as you grow and change.

The founding Board President of KIDPOWER is a long-time friend of mine who is also the co-author of a book called The Courage to Heal that is a tremendous guide to survivors of abuse and that I recommend highly if you haven't read it.

In our adult FULLPOWER program, we often do boundary-setting, personal safety, and self-defense workshops with all kinds of organizations serving survivors of different kinds of abuse as well as with the general public, which includes a high percentage of survivors. The experiential nature of our program gives people the chance to take change of situations where they felt as if they were helpless in the past and practice using People Safety tools to keep themselves safe now. This experience puts the feeling of success into people's body memories, which is why many survivors say that they find our work immensely empowering.

Please let me know if you have any other questions or comments.

Best wishes,
Irene from KIDPOWER

[Dream]

I have never read The Courage to Heal . While it comes close to the abuse, it differs from what I experienced. I have heard of triggers they aren't as crippling as they used to be.. The facts are that like you stated this will always be a part of me.
I will be checking out the FULLPOWER program. I am always open to new ideas for change.

[Hoppy]

Dream,

You continue to awe me with your strength and your compassionate heart. Much love to you. :hearts:

[Busty Vixen]

Dream,

The fact that you see yourself as a survivor instead of a victim is the biggest factor in your potential for empowering yourself. I am so proud of you and the woman you are.

:iluvu:

[*PL*]

Dream,

The fact that you see yourself as a survivor instead of a victim is the biggest factor in your potential for empowering yourself. I am so proud of you and the woman you are.

:iluvu:

this :ita: :love:

[KIDPOWER]

I agree with what everyone else here wrote! One of my heroes is Dr. Viktor Frankl, who invented logotherapy, which is a therapy based on making meaning of your life no matter what happens. While imprisoned at concentration camps in World War II, Dr. Frankl realized that,although many terrible things were happening that were out of his control, he could control decide to what he was going to do in the face of these terrible things. This takes tremendous courage and I really want to honor you for your determination and caring and courage. The reason I mentioned Ellen Bass's book is because, even though it is a different kind of abuse, her work includes how to manage personal triggers resulting from abuse.

I have a broken finger so am finding it a bit hard to type - but will share some of our techniques for taking the power out of personal triggers soon.