Hoppy
05-26-2008, 10:07 AM
From www.screamfree.com
Quote of the Day: "Do not confine your children to your own learning, for they were born in another time. "
— -Chinese proverb
http://www.screamfree.com/resources/partners/template/images/hal_runkel.jpg Hal's Take: We all do it, whether we want to or not. We inevitably compare the lives our children lead to the life we led as a child. But just because we all do it doesn’t make it right. You are doing your child a disservice if you either try to recreate your own childhood or if you try to run away from it. Both of these reactions are based on an assumption that your child is growing up under the same time and place that you did. This kind of thinking is called projection and it does nothing but create the very outcomes you are hoping to avoid.
Instead of either running from or running to your own experience, try taking an objective look at what’s right in front of you. Your child is a unique person whose experiences are totally different from yours at his age. The more you can really see this, the better off you’ll both be. Instead of limiting your child to your own world, you’ll be introducing him to one with even more possibility.
Hal Runkel, LMFT, author of ScreamFree Parenting:
Raising Your Kids by Keeping Your Cool.
Quote of the Day: "Do not confine your children to your own learning, for they were born in another time. "
— -Chinese proverb
http://www.screamfree.com/resources/partners/template/images/hal_runkel.jpg Hal's Take: We all do it, whether we want to or not. We inevitably compare the lives our children lead to the life we led as a child. But just because we all do it doesn’t make it right. You are doing your child a disservice if you either try to recreate your own childhood or if you try to run away from it. Both of these reactions are based on an assumption that your child is growing up under the same time and place that you did. This kind of thinking is called projection and it does nothing but create the very outcomes you are hoping to avoid.
Instead of either running from or running to your own experience, try taking an objective look at what’s right in front of you. Your child is a unique person whose experiences are totally different from yours at his age. The more you can really see this, the better off you’ll both be. Instead of limiting your child to your own world, you’ll be introducing him to one with even more possibility.
Hal Runkel, LMFT, author of ScreamFree Parenting:
Raising Your Kids by Keeping Your Cool.