So, remember Gloria?

[Lady LaRue]

The sneaky bully who takes advantage of her neighbors by dropping her son off without notice?

I got a phone message today from about 1:15 from Gloria asking if her son could "come over and play for a while" because she had a doctor's appointment at 2:30. :eyebrow:

I immediately felt guilty because I worried about her health and didn't want to be a crappy neighbor, but I also knew that this would not work for me because I had a tentative appointment between 3 & 5 to sell our car. I could have taken him with me I supposed, but I just felt too overwhelmed already that we had to sign paperwork, exchange money, titles, etc., and i was already worried about having my own children with me. So I told her no, I had some things to do. She then asked "Are you taking your kids with you?" :eyebrow: :twitch: I said "Yes, I am, but I feel that taking one more would be too much on me and I am simply not able to help you today, I'm sorry."

So, was that okay? :paranoid:

[*PL*]

absolutely perfect. Gloria had some nerve asking if the children were going along as well :mad:

[MIZ]

I think it was perfect. You were completely honest without being mean or passive aggressive. Goooooo Chesty!!:clap:

[cara7166]

Chesty I think you did a GREAT job. I am the same way as you are, it is SO hard for me to just TELL someone. I worry so much about hurting their feelings and I end up getting walked all over. I am so happy that you were able to do this.

[julietteb]

Absolutely don't be bullied.

[bzymomof4]

I think you did the right thing, and you did it tactfully too. Good job!

[KIDPOWER]

I agree with everyone else. You did a GREAT job of being clear, being respectful, and taking care of yourself. There is a big difference between taking your own children and having to be responsible for someone else's child.

You also did a great job of asking for support on this forum - and everyone who replied did a great job of supporting you!

Some people are masterful at using emotional coercion to get others to do what they want - they might not even realize that this is what they are doing, but their tone of voice and ways of trying to pressure others can be very hard on caring people such as yourself. Try to see that feeling of guilt as a warning signal that you are feeling pressured to do something for the WRONG REASON. You should do things because they are right for you and your family to do - not because you are feeling guilty!

So GOOD FOR YOU for not giving in!

[Bastian]

:clap: Good job!!

[Melandco]

Go girl, shoulda told old Gloria that you were just about to ring her and ask her to have YOUR children...I'm picking she woulda hung up in a hurry. :snicker:

Good for you though, I've done this myself today to a 'friend' who wants me to not spend the day with Jango and her family while they are staying with me for a week, to go and run errands for her more then capable self. I put my foot down and it's empowering, I feel good for putting myself first for once.

Now we both just have to keep doing it eh? :kiss: